Peace Is Here with Avis Kalfsbeek

Ep 316 Peacewarts: Social Chemistry 101 – The Invisible Ingredient: Grief (Class 13)

We examine the thermodynamics of emotion, identifying unexpressed grief as the primary fuel for reactive anger. Using the Weimar Republic's Dolchstoßlegende, the Mothers of the Plaza de Mayo, and the TRC's witness containment models as anchors, we explore the clinical requirements for the expression of collective pain. Homework:

1. Look up the Stab-in-the-back myth and find one specific piece of propaganda from the 1920s that illustrates how defeat was reframed as betrayal.
2. Write down one question about any of this episode’s topics. If you don’t have a question, write 'no question.'
3. Optional: Reflect on a time you felt reactive anger. Can you identify a hidden loss or grief that was actually driving that reaction?

Books: If you'd like to read more on this subject, some book suggestions are On Grief and Grieving: Finding the Meaning of Grief Through the Five Stages of Lossby Elisabeth Kübler-Ross and David Kessler, a classic guide on processing deep personal loss (though modern bereavement research emphasizes that grief is a non-linear process rather than ordered steps), and The Book of Forgiving: The Fourfold Path for Healing Ourselves and Our World by Desmond Tutu and Mpho Tutu, an insightful examination of how collective truth-telling, mourning, and forgiveness restore fractured communities after historical trauma.

Learning Topics: Unexpressed Loss; Revanchism; Dolchstoßlegende; The Mothers of the Plaza de Mayo; TRC Witness Briefers; Nomonde Calata; Non-Linear Grief. ·

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Podcast Music: Javier Peke Rodriguez “I am late, madame Curie” https://open.spotify.com/artist/3QuyqfXEKzrpUl6b12I3KW

Ep 315 Peacewarts: Social Chemistry 101 – Listening as a Solvent (Class 12)

Episode Summary: We examine the neurobiology of ideological positions and how active, non-judgmental listening acts as a solvent to dissolve the ego-shield. Using the Highlander Folk School, the Quaker Clearness Committee, and the South African Truth and Reconciliation Commission as anchors, we explore the clinical protocols of Silent Presence and Emotional Labeling.

Homework:

1. Look up Carl Rogers’ Active Listening research and identify the three core conditions he believed were necessary for psychological growth.
2. Write down one question about any of this episode’s topics. If you don’t have a question, write 'no question.'
3. Optional: Research Rosa Parks’ July 1955 workshop at the Highlander Folk School. How did her time in the Highlander learning circles influence her perspective just months before the Montgomery Bus Boycott?

Books: If you'd like to read more on this subject, some book suggestions are On Becoming a Person by Carl R. Rogers, a foundational psychological masterpiece detailing how unconditional positive regard and active listening dissolve emotional defensiveness, and Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, and Sheila Heen, a practical guide from the Harvard Negotiation Project on navigating high-stakes interpersonal conflicts through empathetic listening and curiosity.

Learning Topics: Listening as a Solvent; The Ego-Shield; Amygdala vs. Prefrontal Cortex; Carl Rogers; Highlander Folk School (1955); Quaker Clearness Committees; Truth and Reconciliation Commission (TRC); FBI Behavioral Change Stairway.

Join the Community / Get the Books: www.AvisKalfsbeek.com · Podcast Music: Javier Peke Rodriguez “I am late, madame Curie” https://open.spotify.com/artist/3QuyqfXEKzrpUl6b12I3KW

Ep 314 Peacewarts: Social Chemistry 101 – The Two-Body Problem (Class 11) Episode Summary: We examine why social stability is best achieved through the dyad rather than the crowd. Using the 1985 Geneva Summit fireside meeting and the Camp David "Grandchildren" tactic as anchors, we explore how reducing audience pressure through the "Two-Body" protocol enables high-stakes peace-making. Homework:

1. Look up the Geneva Summit of 1985 and find primary source accounts of the "fireside" pool house meeting between Reagan and Gorbachev.How did moving away from their advisors change the tenor of their discussion?
2. Write down one question about any of this episode’s topics. If you don’t have a question, write 'no question.'
3. Optional: Research Martin Buber'sI and Thou  How does he distinguish between seeing someone as an "It" (a category) versus a "Thou" (a person)?

Books: If you'd like to read more on this subject, some book suggestions are I and Thou by Martin Buber, the foundational philosophical work exploring how direct, unmediated human encounter transforms relational chemistry, and Thirteen Days: A Memoir of the Cuban Missile Crisis by Robert F. Kennedy, a vivid first-hand account detailing how private, isolated channels and two-body conversations averted catastrophic global escalation.

Learning Topics: The Two-Body Problem; Deindividuation Models; The Social Engagement System; Geneva Summit (1985); Camp David Accords (1978); The Hallway Effect; Labor "Side Room" Negotiations. ·

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Podcast Music: Javier Peke Rodriguez “I am late, madame Curie” https://open.spotify.com/artist/3QuyqfXEKzrpUl6b12I3KW

Ep 313 Peacewarts: Social Chemistry 101 – Sleep, Hunger, and War (Class 10) Episode Summary: We examine the biological foundations of stability, focusing on how sleep deprivation and hunger degrade the prefrontal cortex and amplify threat perception. Using the 12-Step framework of HALT, executive fatigue during the Cuban Missile Crisis, and the French Revolution, we explore why regulated bodies are a prerequisite for sustained peace. Homework:

1. Look up the 2007 sleep deprivation study by Dr. Matthew Walker and colleagues (Yoo et al., Current Biology). Identify the percentage increase in amygdala reactivity found after one night without sleep.
2. Write down one question about any of this episode’s topics. If you don’t have a question, write 'no question.'
3. Optional: Research the physical condition of S. Executive Committee participants during the Cuban Missile Crisis. How did extreme sleep deprivation impact decision-making during the thirteen days?

Books: If you'd like to read more on this subject, some book suggestions are Why We Sleep: Unlocking the Power of Sleep and Dreams by Matthew Walker, Ph.D., an influential and widely read account of how sleep loss impacts emotional regulation, though parts of it have been challenged for accuracy, and Essence of Decision: Explaining the Cuban Missile Crisis by Graham Allison and Philip Zelikow, a classic political science study analyzing the crisis through three competing models of governmental decision-making.

Learning Topics: The HALT Protocol; 12-Step Recovery Frameworks; Executive Fatigue in Crisis; Hunger as an Accelerant; Heat and Aggression; Cognitive Limits in Statecraft. ·

Join the Community / Get the Books: www.AvisKalfsbeek.com ·

Podcast Music: Javier Peke Rodriguez “I am late, madame Curie” https://open.spotify.com/artist/3QuyqfXEKzrpUl6b12I3KW

Ep 312 AI Knows How to Stop War (Killing); Women Do Too: A Fool’s Errand

"Anything you can weigh, you can outweigh. The only way to stop killing is to treat non-killing as a floor."

For this special 64th birthday episode, Avis explores a powerful, two-part reflection on how we construct non-killing as a non-negotiable rule rather than a calculated trade-off.

First, Avis and Claude discuss war and killing and the question: Why do moral systems fail when harm-avoidance is treated as a "weight" in a sum rather than an absolute "floor"? Thye dive into Isaac Asimov’s Laws of Robotics, the mechanics of international law (jus cogens), and the famous "trolley problem" to see why an operational prohibition against killing is both mathematically necessary and entirely possible.

Then, Avis steps back to April 1915, when over a thousand women gathered at The Hague in the middle of World War I. While military leaders calculated the cost of war, women across enemy lines set an absolute floor for peace. We trace their courage, from facing hostility at home and mine-strewn seas to directly confronting heads of state on an impossible "fool's errand."

In This Episode:

• Birthday Intro:Don’t miss Teo’s ultimate birthday promise.
• Part 1: The AI Logic of Non-Killing:Floors vs. weights, why Asimov’s Laws were built to break, and how operational rules hold. (Assisted by Claude)
• Part 2: The Women of 1915:How 150 delegates crossed closed borders during World War I to establish the Women's International League for Peace and Freedom (WILPF). (Assisted by Gemini)

Join the Community & Get the Books: www.AvisKalfsbeek.com

Podcast Music: ElevenLabs by Avis Kalfsbeek

Ep 311 Peacewarts: Social Chemistry 101 – The Intoxicated Empire (Class 9) Episode Summary: We examine the neurobiology of addiction and how substance-induced hypofrontality bypasses the rational prefrontal cortex. Using six historical cases and contemporary global statistics, we explore how chemical saturation—from illicit drugs to widespread prescription use—defines the modern background environment of decision-making. Homework:

1. Look up Norman Ohler’s work inBlitzed regarding Pervitin in WWII. How was methamphetamine initially used by German troops during the Blitzkrieg, and why did military leaders eventually try to restrict it?
2. Write down one question about any of this episode’s topics. If you don’t have a question, write 'no question.'
3. Optional: Research James Schlesinger’s actions during the final days of the Nixon administration. Why did he consider it necessary to alter nuclear command procedures?

Books: If you'd like to read more on this subject, some book suggestions are In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts: Close Encounters with Addiction by Gabor Maté, M.D., a compassionate and widely read examination of how trauma and biology drive addiction, and Blitzed: Drugs in the Third Reich by Norman Ohler, a widely discussed account of drug use in the Third Reich detailing how chemical dependence distorted decision-making and military volatility.

Learning Topics: Hypofrontality; Prefrontal Cortex Regulation; Norman Ohler (Blitzed); The Modern Saturation; Russian State-Monopoly Economics; Procedural Safeguards; The Sobriety of Statecraft. ·

Join the Community / Get the Books: www.AvisKalfsbeek.com ·
Podcast Music: Javier Peke Rodriguez “I am late, madame Curie” https://open.spotify.com/artist/3QuyqfXEKzrpUl6b12I3KW

Ep 310 Peacewarts: Social Chemistry 101 – The Chemistry of Shame (Class 8) Episode Summary: We examine the neurobiology of humiliation and its role as a primary accelerant for aggression. Using the clinical research of Dr. James Gilligan, the records of Abu Ghraib, and the manufactured national humiliation surrounding Article 231 of the Treaty of Versailles, we explore the protocols for preserving dignity to prevent the shame-to-violence bypass. Homework:

1. Look up Dr. James Gilligan's work on shame and violence. How does unacknowledged shame act as the primary emotional driver behind violent behavior?
2. Write down one question about any of this episode's topics. If you don't have a question, write 'no question.'
3. Optional: Look up Article 231 of the 1919 Treaty of Versailles. How was this legal clause reframed into theKriegsschuldlüge (war guilt lie) to drive national humiliation?

Books: If you'd like to read more on this subject, some book suggestions are Violence: Reflections on a National Epidemic by James Gilligan, M.D., the landmark clinical study mapping the direct relationship between experienced humiliation and extreme violent behavior, and Why People Obey the Law by Tom R. Tyler, a foundational work on procedural justice showing how perceived dignity and fairness drive public compliance over punishment.

Learning Topics: Humiliation as an Accelerant; Neurobiology of Social Rejection; James Gilligan (Prisons Research); The Taguba Report (2004); Article 231 & Manufactured Shame; Procedural Justice. ·

Join the Community / Get the Books: www.AvisKalfsbeek.com · Podcast Music: Javier Peke Rodriguez “I am late, madame Curie” https://open.spotify.com/artist/3QuyqfXEKzrpUl6b12I3KW

Peacewarts Lab 8-23-26: Disguise, Homework, and A Birthday Announcement

After the mild humiliation of our last lab session, Avis arrives in disguise to review student homework from recent Peacewarts classes. We dive into the practical applications of social connection, de-escalation, and humanization across three foundational lessons:

• Ep 305 Social Chemistry 101 (Class 6):The Belonging Bond
• Ep 307 Social Chemistry 101 (Class 7):The De-escalation Posture
• Ep 308 Social Chemistry 101 (Class 8):The Humanizing Formula

Coming This Thursday (August 27): Special Birthday Episode Join us this Thursday for a special birthday trip between Peacewarts departments in an episode titled A Fool’s Errand. We step back to April 1915, when over a thousand women risked family, public ridicule, and war-torn seas on an impossible, beautiful mission to stop World War I.

Join the Community & Get the Books: www.AvisKalfsbeek.com

Podcast Music: ElevenLabs by Avis Kalfsbeek

Ep 308 Peacewarts: Social Chemistry 101 - The Humanizing Formula (Class 7) Episode Summary: We examine "Empathy Mechanics" and how to collapse the monster images that form during high-stress conflict. Using Mo Mowlam’s 1998 visit to the Maze Prison as a historical anchor, we explore the protocols for restoring human scale to an opponent through physical cues, ordinary details, and breaking the villain script. Homework:

1. Look up Mo Mowlam and find out why she was called “the people’s peacemaker.”
2. Write down one question about any of this episode's topics. If you don't have a question, write 'no question.'
3. Optional: Practice identifying "ordinary details" to de-escalate an internal monster image. Books: If you'd like to read more on this subject, some book suggestions are The Anatomy of Peace by the Arbinger Institute, an essential manual on overcoming heart-at-war mindsets and dismantling objectifying caricatures during conflict, and Intractable Conflicts: Socio-Psychological Foundations and Dynamics by Daniel Bar-Tal, an insightful study detailing how intractable conflicts rely on socio-psychological barriers and how humanizing interventions disrupt demonization. Learning Topics: The Monster Image; Villain Scripts; Mo Mowlam (1998); Empathy Mechanics; Ordinary Details; Scale Protocols. ·

Join the Community / Get the Books: www.AvisKalfsbeek.com ·

Podcast Music: Javier Peke Rodriguez “I am late, madame Curie” https://open.spotify.com/artist/3QuyqfXEKzrpUl6b12I3KW

Ep 307 Peacewarts: Social Chemistry 101 - The De-escalator’s Posture (Class 6) Episode Summary: We examine Threat Math—how the primitive brain calculates danger based on body geometry. Using Nelson Mandela’s transition of power in 1994 and the 1960 Nashville sit-ins as historical anchors, we explore the protocols for signaling biological safety through physical posture and the Open Angle. Homework:

1. Look up Nelson Mandela’s 1994 inauguration gestures or John Lewis's 1960 Rules of Conduct.
2. Write down one question about any of this episode's topics. If you don't have a question, write 'no question.'
3. Optional: Practice the Open Angle and Open Palms in a conversation.

Books: If you'd like to read more on this subject, some book suggestions are What Every BODY is Saying by Joe Navarro, an essential guide by a former FBI counterintelligence agent on reading nonverbal threat signals and projecting calmness, and The Definitive Book of Body Language by Barbara Pease and Allan Pease, a comprehensive breakdown of human postural geometry, spatial dynamics, and power signals. Learning Topics: Threat Math; The Primitive Brain; 1994 South African Transition; 1960 Nashville Sit-Ins; James Lawson & John Lewis; The Open Angle; Safety Signaling. ·

Join the Community / Get the Books: www.AvisKalfsbeek.com ·

Podcast Music: Javier Peke Rodriguez “I am late, madame Curie” https://open.spotify.com/artist/3QuyqfXEKzrpUl6b12I3KW